Czy mógłby ktoś mi w miarę prędko poprawić błędy? Wskazać może, co powinnam zmienić, co dodać. Jakieś wskazówki.
Chciałabym sprawdzić, czy poradzę sobie jutro z napisaniem ewentualnego opowiadania na maturze ;)
Temat: napisać opowiadanie, w którym bohater pomaga zapobiec przestępstwu podczas przedmiotowi znalezionemu na ulicy.
It was an unseasonably cold day for this time of year. John was wandering around the street of Machester for almost 2 hours. He didn’t want to think about the last 3 days. Probably because he got into a row with his parents. There wasn’t anyone with him, when he had needed someone.
So he was walking all along, when suddenly he fell down. Then he noticed a weird thing on the sidewalk. He thought, ‘what is that?’. He looked closely at the big brown thing, which was covered by shadows. John reached for it with his hands and felt an wooden surface. It was a branch. A really big branch. He took it with himself, he didn’t even know why. Maybe John felt unsafe? All in all, it was a night in a big city, that means there are a lot of people. Who would know if there was any robbery?
His feelings were really right, because just a few meters far from the place, when that boy had found the branch in, he saw the tall man with a mask on his face. ‘Be quiet! And give me your bag and anything you have!’ told that masked man to the blond girl, who looked really scared and helpless. What happened next, was that John hit the robbery with the branch! He fell out, then John helped the young woman escape from that place.
The following day he got a lot of attention in medias. Everyone was talking about heroic act of John. He became a regional hero and got a badge from the president of Manchester! It was an unbelievable action.
edytowany przez grieve: 08 maj 2013