LIST FORMALNY (poziom CAE)

Siemka.. Mialbym prosbe by ktos doswiadczony w pisaniu listow formalnych sprawdzil ten list ;] Jestem studentem IIroq filologii angielskiej i niestety zawsze mialem problem z wszelakimi formami prac pisemnych.;] Ogolnie to czekam na jakies uwagi odnosnie gramatyki, interpunkcji no i oczywiscie cos zrobic by ten list brzmial bardzsiej formalnie. BARDZO potrzebuje wysokiej oceny za ta prace dlatego zwracam sie do was ;] a oto list :

Dear Mr Faraday,
I am writing on behalf of students in general and I
would like to express our strong dissatisfaction with the the
article entitled : "It's a student's life" which appeared in your recent edition
of "English in Action" magazine.
First of all, the views about living off other people's money contained in your
article were extreme and unfound. There is no doubt that students need money and their fundings are usually provided by parents. Though, one of mostly forgotten and generous reason of studying for us as a children is supporting financially our parents in the future and rewarding their struggle with parenting by gettinh better job and educational backgroud.
Secondly, I cannot agree with the statement that students don’t know the meaning of word “work”. The wide meaning of the phrase enables the stressful educational process to be qualified as a hard work, which frequently compel us to learn after hours. What is more, quite a number of scholars are given the possibility t take up a job granted thanks to days free from classes, where the most prevalent choice are bars and reastaurants.
In conclusion, I found your article to be a spurious vision of student’s life, what might have been caused by insufficiently piercing analysis or too small number of people subjected to the review. Moreover, the autregeous fact is the preadventure in our future. Everyone can be affected by stress or hard work and anyone can experience it in varying degrees, at different stages of life and for some the great achievement was to get to school of their dreams. Thereupon, the term “real world” should be left as a concept difficult to define.

Yours soncerely,
XYZ

Nie bede poprawial interpunkcji i gramatyki, tylko kilka bledow jakie od razu rzucily mi sie w oczy:


view - kolokacja, hold, express, present, nie spotkalem sie z contained
unfound - nie ma takiego slowa
fundings - bez liczby mnogiej
though - zle uzycie, tutaj raczej however
one of mostly - zle, the most forgotten reason albo one of the most forgotten reasons
generous reason - na pewno to miales na mysli?
a children - bez a
supporting - to support
rewarding - to reward
gettinh better job and educational backgroud - a better job, "educational background" zle
of word - of the word
phrase - word to nie jest wyrazenie tylko slowo

What is more, quite a number of scholars are given the possibility t take up a job granted thanks to days free from classes, where the most prevalent choice are bars and reastaurants. - tego to nie rozumiem o co ci chodzi

to the review - nie jestem pewien, ale to slowo ma zwykle inne znaczenie

autregeous - nie ma takiego slowa - outrageous?
preadventure - nie ma takiego slowa: peradventure?

Moreover, the autregeous fact is the preadventure in our future. Everyone can be affected by stress or hard work and anyone can experience it in varying degrees, at different stages of life and for some the great achievement was to get to school of their dreams. Thereupon, the term “real world" should be left as a concept difficult to define. - nie wiem o czym tu piszesz, o stresie, a nagle o o osiagnieciu jakim jest dostanie sie do szkolu, to sie nie trzyma kupy

ocman,
napisz to jeszcze raz uwzgledniajac poprawki artura - cos z tym tekstem jest. Jak napiszesz, to jeszcze raz zobaczymy.

Poprawilem tych kilka literówek ale niektory wyrazenia wydaje mi sie ze pasuja bo odnosza sie to tekstu.. ale jesli jednak mimo to macie watpliwosci to moge napisac tresc zadania i tekst(artykul). tyle ze to strata czasu, ktorego nie mam zbyt wiele. musze miec ostateczna wersje do srody wlacznie. wiec prosze o jak najszybsza odp i moze rady jak sprawic by ten list byl bardziej formalny i moze teoretycznie proponowana ocene wg was..

Dear Mr Faraday,
I am writing on behalf of students in general and I would like to express our strong dissatisfaction with the article entitled : "It's a student's life" which appeared in your recent edition of "English in Action" magazine.
First of all, the views about living off other people's money contained in your article were extreme and unfounded. There is no doubt that students need money and their funding are usually provided by parents. However, one of the most forgotten and simultaneously generous reason of studying for us as children is to support financially our parents in the future and to reward their struggle with parenting by getting better educational backgroud and proper job in consequence.
Secondly, I cannot agree with the statement that students don’t even know the meaning of the word “work”. The wide meaning of the phrase enables the stressful educational process to be qualified as a hard work, which frequently compel us to learn after hours. What is more, quite a number of scholars are given the possibility to take up a job granted thanks to days free from classes, where the most prevalent choice are bars and reastaurants.
In conclusion, I found your article to be a spurious vision of student’s life, what might have been caused by insufficiently piercing analysis or too small number of people subjected to the review. Moreover, the outrageous fact is the peradventure in our future. Everyone can be affected by stress or hard work and anyone can experience it in varying degrees, at different stages of life and for some the great achievement was to get to school of their dreams. Thereupon, the term “real world” should be left as a concept difficult to define.

Yours sincerely,
XYZ

"What is more, quite a number of scholars are given the possibility t take up a job granted thanks to days free from classes, where the most prevalent choice are bars and reastaurants. - tego to nie rozumiem o co ci chodzi"
tu chodzilo mi o to ze studenci maja mozliwosc podjecia sie pracy co dzieki dnia wolnym od zajeć gdzie najardziej powszechnym wyborem sa(...) Moze rzeczywiscie potraktowalem to jak kalka z pl na ang ;] ale czekam na jakas prop. co do tego zdania.

"Moreover, the autregeous fact is the preadventure in our future. Everyone can be affected by stress or hard work and anyone can experience it in varying degrees, at different stages of life and for some the great achievement was to get to school of their dreams. Thereupon, the term “real world" should be left as a concept difficult to define. - nie wiem o czym tu piszesz, o stresie, a nagle o o osiagnieciu jakim jest dostanie sie do szkolu, to sie nie trzyma kupy"
Co dokladnie nie 3ma sie qpy?? bo jesli patrze na tekst zrodlowy do ktorego odnosi sie ten urywek tekstu to wg mnie to pasuje .. ;]

PLEASE o jak najszybsza odp. I dzieki za poprzednie odp;]

Zadanie jest z Upstream'a Advanced ;] zostawiam nr gg jakby co : 4910258 ;]