Wypracowanie prosze o sprawdzenie

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Witam Prosiłbym o sprawdzenie wypracowania
poziom prawie CAE 2[tel]znaków

"How can you prevent adult student from infantile beheaviout at school"

Infantile behaviour at school is a compicated problem, becouse it is focused
on grup of people in which everyone have something to says and sometimes beheive of the whole grup define one unit.
If we talk about adult students we have simply may think that they have been responsible for what they (do??), but in the real world not always it is. So if we had a such problem we should not think how to punish the students, insted of this we must take whole situacion on our considiration and try to explain, with the students what they do it , and what was the causes of doing it. Ofcorse I not aprove that behaviour and I think that adult people should not behaive in a such a way, but if we decided to punish ours students we must be aware of our decision.
On the other hand in every school we have rules and we must follow by it, so if someone have not respected this rules we should not punish but, but get a consequences of his beheaviour, and if we treats ours students in that way we show them that they must respected it.(końcówka jakaś taka nijaka;/;/:)
In conclusion, if I in the future will be a teacher I will simply follow by that principles, and in my point of view that is a best way.

Dzięki za poprawe
pozdrawiam:)
"How can you prevent adult student from infantile beheaviouR at school"

Infantile behaviour at school is a compLicated problem, becAuse it (is focused) FOCUSES on A grup of people in which everyone (have) HAS something to say and sometimes (beheive) A BEHAVIOUR of the whole grup defineS (a behaviour of) (one unit)użyłabym an INDIVIDUAL.
If we talk about adult students we (have) - PO CO TO??? simply may think that they (have been) ARE responsible for what they (do??), but in the real world (not always it is) IT IS NOT ALWAYS SO . So if we had such A problem we should not think how to punish (the) students, (insted of this we must) BUT TO take (whole) THE situaTion (on our) INTO considiration and try to explain (with the) TO students what they HAVE DONE (it) -ZBĘDNE , and what WERE the causes of doing THAT. Of coUrse I DO not aPprove SUCH A behaviour and I think that adult people should not behaive in a such a way, but if we decided to punish our students we must be aware of our decisionS.
On the other hand, in every school we have rules and we must follow (by it) THEM. (so) THEREFORE, if someone (have) DOES not respect(ed) thEsE rules we should not punish but, (get a consequences of) TAKE APPROPRIATE MEASURES AGAINST his beheaviour, and if we treat(s) our(s) students (in) that way we show them that they must respect(ed) it.(końcówka jakaś taka nijaka;/;/:)
In conclusion, if I will be a teacher (in the future) I will simply follow thESE principles, and in my point of view thIS is THE best way.

Dzięki za poprawe

Sorki, ale jak dla mnie to nie napisałeś jak zapobiegać takiemu zachowaniu. Wyracowanie jest o niczym i zawiera bardzo podstawowe błędy. Z pewnością daleko mu do FCE, nie mówiąc już o CAE.
Bez urazy
Hanka
If I am a teacher! Nie zauważyłam.
ok:)
no niestety nienawidze pisac ;/;/ i jestem świadom tego ze robię takie błędy..
Napisz od nowa.
Błędy ortograficzne to pospoliste niechlujstwo połączone z lenistwem. Rozumiem, że czasem się zdarzy jeden czy dwa, ale nie kilkadziesiąć w tak krótkim wypracowanku.

Jeśli w przyszłości chcesz pracować fizycznie, to pisania możesz sobie nienawidzieć. W przeciwnym wypadku, lepiej go polubić.
do eva:)
konstruktywna krytyka:)
napisze jeszcze raz i dam do sprawdzenia:)
podr
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