Bardzo proszę o sprawdzenie wypracowania i wprowadzenie ewentualnych zmian w treści

Temat przeniesiony do archwium.
The studies is not only science

These days more and more students want to be independent and choose to work during their education. Reconciling the job with studying breaks them is balls. The students usually wrestle with a lack of time and too large amount of chores. So how can they earn own money and achieve high scores in exams simultaneously?
First of all, it is important to make a good plan of your day. One way to solve the problem with a lack of time to learn is finding a job at weekends. This way you will be able to concentrate on study and earn your keep concurrently. When you will try to implement this plan in your life, you will not have to slack your grades and even you will become independent. In addition, you can gain a wrok experience which will be necessary to find a better job after university.
Another way to reconcile work with study is choosing the extramural studies. In doing so, you would work for weekdays and you would attend classes at the weekends. You will be able to vote your salary not only for maintaing yourself but also for paying your tuition fees. The problem with the lack of time to learn will not concern you nevermore because you would study after job or classes. As a result, you would work more and consequently you would gain a greater professional experience.
To sum up, making a good plan of your day is the best solution to connect studying to work. Everything is possible to do if we really want this and aim our goals.
The (potrzebne the?) studies (liczba mnoga) i raczej inne słowo takie jak uniwersytet, koledz byłoby tu na miejscu)
is not only science (pewnie chodzie o czynnośc uczenie sie czyli szukasz słowa podobnego do study)


These days more and more students want to be independent and choose to work during their education. Reconciling the job with studying breaks them is balls (nie do końca rozumiem). Students usually wrestle with a lack of time and too large amount of (zastąp to tzw. quantifier na literę M...)chores. So how can they earn (do kogo mają należeć te pieniadze, zaimek potrzebny) own money and achieve high scores in exams simultaneously(za formalne słowo w stsounku do całego tekstu, potrzebujesz wyrażenie : w tym samym czasie)?
First of all, it is important to make a good plan of your day (jest takie zestawienie jak day plan). One way to solve the problem with (inny przyimek)a (już inny przedimek,powtarzasz to po raz drugi) lack of time (przetłumacz "jest") to learn is finding (coś tu nie gra w sensie)a job at weekends. This way you will be able to concentrate on (zaimek) study and earn your keep concurrently(za formalne). When you will(zdanie czasowe tego when nie potrzebujemy) try to implement(trochę formalnie) this plan in(to) your life, you will not have to slack (inny czasownik)your grades and even(wstaw to słowo dwa miejsca dalej) you will become independent. In addition, you can gain a (nie potrzebne) wrok (work)experience which will (jest ciągle teraz )be necessary to find a better job after university.
Another way to reconcile work with study is choosing the extramural studies. In (inne słowo dwu literowe na litere b)doing so, you would work for(nie potrzebne) weekdays and you would attend classes at the (nie potrzebne , mówisz ogólnie) weekends. You will be able to vote(złe słowo) your salary not only for maintaing (zmien na słowo ktore było użyte wcześniej na litery kee..)yourself but also for paying your tuition fees. The problem with the lack of time to learn will not concern you nevermore (zle slowo) because you would study after job or classes. As a result, you would work more , and consequently you would gain a (experience w tym znaczeniu jest niepoliczalne) greater professional experience.
To sum up, making a good plan of your day is the best solution to connect (inny czsownik) studying to(inny przyimek) work. Everything is possible to do if we really want this(nie ma odniesienia, słowo niepotrzebne) and (trzeba powtórzyć jeszcze raz: jeśli my po angieslku)aim our goals.
ostatnie trzy wyrazy po aim łączy się z przymkiem