Sprawdzenie listu

Witam. :) Moim zadaniem było napisanie listu formalnego do wlaściciela hotelu w sprawie zostawionej przeze mnie rzeczy. List napisałam, ale chciałam się zwrócić z prośbą o sprawdzenie go. Z góry bardzo serdecznie dziękuję. :)
Oto treść:

Dear Mr Goldenmayer
I am writing to you in connection with my stay in your hotel. My name is XYZ and I was a resident of your hotel during a holiday.
I would like to mention that I am impressed your enterprise and I thoroughly enjoyed my stay in that place.
The main cause for which I am writing is leaving by me a necklace which belonged to my mother. It is very important thing for me because of being the only one souvenir after her.
It is silver and its characteristic feature is a big, sapphire stone. Supposedly, a place where it is, is a cupboard near the bed in room number twenty-eight.
I would be greateful if you were willing to sent it back to me. I would like also to empharise that I will cover entire postages.

Bardzo proszę, aby ktoś podjął się sprawdzenia. Jest mi to bardzo potrzebne na jutro.

Dear Mr Goldenmayer (znak interpunkcyjny)
I am writing to you in connection with my stay in your hotel. My name is XYZ and I was a resident (lepiej guest) of your hotel during a holiday (kiedy?).
I would like to mention that I am (zly czas) impressed (brakuje "z")your enterprise (lepiej establishment) and I thoroughly enjoyed my stay.
The main (albo MY) for writing is TO INQUIRE ABOUT A FORGOTTEN ITEM: a necklace which belonged to my mother THAT WAS LEFT BEHIND WHEN I CHECKED OUT. It is A very important ITEM TO me FOR SENTIMENTAL REASONS .
It is silver and its MOST DEFINING feature is a big, sapphire stone. [Supposedly, a place where it is, is a cupboard near the bed in room number twenty-eight....belkot,po pracuj dalej]
I would be greateful (orto) if you senD it back to me. I would (like also...kol slow) to empharise (orto) that I will cover THE COST OF postage.

My name is XYZ and I was a resident of your hotel during a holiday. MUSISZ PODAĆ DATY, NUMER POKOJU - JAK CIE ZIDENTYFIKUJĄ?
I would like to SAY that I am impressed BRAK PRZYIMKA your enterprise and I thoroughly enjoyed my stay AT TU LEPIEJ WSTAW NAZWĘ HOTELU.
The main REASON WHY I am writing is THAT I LEFT IN MY ROOM a necklace which belonged to my mother. It is PRZEDIMEK very important thing for me because IT IS the only one MEMENTO OF her.
It is silver and its characteristic feature is a big, sapphire stone GDZIE - NA SRODKU, NA DOLE?. Supposedly, THE place where it is is THE cupboard near the bed in room number twenty-eight.NUMER POKOJU PODAJ WCZESNIEJ, CHYBA ZE TO NIE BYL TWOJ POKOJ
I would be greateful

:)

Dziękuję bardzo:)
Jeżeli chodzi o zdanie z miejscem zostawienia naszyjnika, to może być tam coś takiego:

I am convinced that I left it into one of cupboard drawers ( i teraz chciałabym dodać, że obok lożka, czyli near bed, czy by the bed?)