staram się napisać logiczne i poprawne opowiadanie. proszę o sprawdzenie. to pierwsza jego część. pozdrowionka!

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Paris dicided to left her country becouse of economic problems afflicting her country. Ad first she didn't knew what country to choose so she dicided to go to France. Probably becouse of her name (my mother gave her very specific name) Paris had choose to go to France, of course to Paris. She is well behaved and she is open to strangers. She have been great in school and she had notable certificate so she may started to respectable university. She is bravious girl and she ordered a ticket at the beginning of November. When that moment came and she had arrived to Paris she need to go to find some flat. She was walking around the city to find some special place for her and she found very nice and cheep place in the center of the city. She was terrified because of language, she was very good student in french, but she never learn to comunicate in this language with native speakers. Thats why was reallly hard for her to understand people which were talking fast and blending. She found the flat near the square where is the town hall. The owner of the flat is Margaret Sink and this is a very kind person. She is renting all two rooms flat, one room for her, and one room for 23 years boy, so Paris will have home mate names Martin who is from United Kingdom. Martin seemed to be a very nice person. First day she started unpucked and put together all her stuff and after that she was really tired so she went to sleep. Day after she focused on responsibilies, especially on her studies. She took all her documents and skills and she went to the university to bring everything required to school. She wants to go on business studies and otherwise she wants to go to improve her french language on some course. She is filling very nice in Paris, although she doesnt ave friends there yet. She likes to visit new places and look on new things around her. Shes not a fan of seating in home so she started to find some places to spend the time for have her's head in the clounds and build castles in the air. She likes to daydream in a quiet atmosphere. She also likes music so she bought event newspaper and she went to the park to read what is going on in the city at next days. She found that at saturday in the hell club will be her favourite dj named Extrawelt and that was positive suprise for her. She knows tha begginings are the hardest, but she is optimistic and she believe that she will feel good in France. Right now she is preety fascinated about the France, but she miss for her familly a litlle bit. She's writing massages to her parents every day and they believes in her so much. She have two weeks to started studies so she have a lot of free time and she enjoying her new city. Every day is quite similar, she's walking in the city and she started to began to be friends with her room mate. She is very carrefoul with boys because she doesnt want to fall in love. She have her studies right now and she had been hurt many times because of boys thats why she is reserved. Her best dream is have somebody to love whitch will be far from her right now. She dicided that when she will have a boyfriend she will meet with him maximum 4 time in the year. Unfortunately there is not any boy in the world whom will accept that. Paris is really beautilull and boys like her but she knows that she to fust and to much attached to peaple. Thats why she knows when she fall in love her studies will in trouble. She love hard and intensive so will be good to have distance to her new boyfriend and be far from him. Sometimes she's thinking that meybe she have problems with herself and she is mental, everything is because of she is so sensitive. In short she have too strong feelings to people whitch she likes.
Paris dicided to left her country becouse of economic problems afflicting her country/powtarzasz sie/. Ad first she didn't knew what country to choose so she dicided to go to France. Probably becouse of her name my??? mother gave her very specific name) Paris had choose to go to France, of course to Paris. She is well behaved and she is open to strangers. She have been great in school and she had notable certificate so she may started to respectable university. She is bravious girl and she ordered a ticket at the beginning of November.

+ gdzie przedimki?
edytowany przez fui_eu: 03 paź 2012
Co to znowu z tymi przedimkami jest? Jakas czarna magia? Dlaczego ich nie uzywasz? Myslisz, ze TY akurat mozesz ich omijac???


She is (cos brak) 'bravious' (zle slowo) girl and she ordered a ticket at the beginning of November. When that moment came and she had arrived 'to' (zle slowo) Paris she 'need' (zler slowo) to go 'to' (zle slowo) find some flat. She was walking around the city to find some special place for her and she found (cos brak) very nice and 'cheep' (zle slowo) place in the 'center' (centre-BrE) of the city. She was terrified because of (cois brak) language, she was (cos brak) very good student in 'french' (popraw), but she never 'learn' (zle slowo) to comunicate in this language with native speakers. 'Thats' (popraw) why (cos brak) was reallly hard for her to understand people 'which' (zle slowo) were talking fast and 'blending' (z kim? czym? o co tu chodzi?).

Cytat: terri
Co to znowu z tymi przedimkami jest? Jakas czarna magia? Dlaczego ich nie uzywasz? Myslisz, ze TY akurat mozesz ich omijac???

terri, your written Polish often sounds a little bit hmnn...rude? Don't think that it is intended. You're behaving a sort of battleaxe who will box any learner's ears for doing something wrong.

The use of articles cause most trouble for any learner of English, sometimes knowing a rule is not enough to use it effectively, you need a language instinct in this case. Believe me, for us, learners, it is not as much simple as it seems, even if we know the rule how to use it.
@lolenaj
Poczytaj o uzyciu articles.
She found the flat near the square where is the town hall. The owner of the flat is Margaret Sink and this is a very kind person. She is renting all/ZASTAP PRZEDIMKIEM/ two rooms flat, one room for her, and one room for 23 years boy, so Paris will have home mate names Martin who is from United Kingdom. Martin seemed to be a very nice person. First day she started unpucked and put together all her stuff and after that she was really tired so she went to sleep. Day after she focused on responsibilies, especially on her studies. She took all her documents and skills and she went to the university to bring everything required to school. /NO OPINION/

PRZEDIMKI!!!! Niektore podkreslenia moga byc tylko literowkami.
edytowany przez fui_eu: 03 paź 2012
hejka. szczerze mówiąc to jestem samoukiem z angielskiego i czasy i przedimki to moja nienajlepsza strona. ;/
postaram się poprawić i słuchać Waszych wskazówek.
mam nadzieję, że dobrze poprawię tekst, w razie czego go opublikuję i jeżeli Was to nie będzie nudzić to możecie zerknąć czy będzie poprawiony z pozytywnym skutkiem, bo czasami nie do końca wiem na czym polega błąd. dzięki wielkie!
poprawione miejsca zrobię pogrubioną czcionką, żeby Wam ułatwić. :)
“Paris go to Paris”

Paris has dicided to left the Poland because of economic problems afflicting her country. Firstly she didn't know what country to choose so she has dicided to go to the France. Probably because of her name (her mother gave her very specific name) Paris has choosen to go to the France, of course to the Paris. She is well behaved and she is open to the strangers. She has been great in school and she has a notable certificate so she may started at the respectable university. She is a brave girl and she ordered a ticket at the beginning of November. When that moment came and she had arrived to(dlaczego to to złe słowo?) the Paris she needs to go to find some flat. She was walking around the city to find some special place for her and she found a very nice and cheap place in the center of the city. She was terrified because of her language, she was very good student in French, but she never learned to comunicate in this language with native speakers. That's why it was reallly hard for her to understand french people who were talking fast with her and they worlds were blending. She found the flat near the square where is the town hall(co tutaj jest źle? nie mam pojęcia:). The owner of the flat is Margaret Sink and this is a very kind person. She is renting a two 'room flat, one room for(for, dlaczego źle?) her, and one room for 23 years boy, so Paris will have a home mate names Martin who is from the United Kingdom. Martin seemed to be a very nice person. First day she started to unpuck and put together(co jest źle?) all her stuff and after that she was really tired so she went to sleep. Day after she focused on responsibilities, especially on her studies. She took all her documents and skills and she went to the university to bring everything required to school. (opinia jest wskazana)She wants to go on business studies and otherwise she wants to go to improve her french language on some course. She is filling very nice in Paris, although she doesnt ave friends there yet. She likes to visit new places and look on new things around her. Shes not a fan of seating in home so she started to find some places to spend the time for have her's head in the clounds and build castles in the air. She likes to daydream in a quiet atmosphere. She also likes music so she bought event newspaper and she went to the park to read what is going on in the city at next days. She found that at saturday in the hell club will be her favourite dj named Extrawelt and that was positive suprise for her. She knows tha begginings are the hardest, but she is optimistic and she believe that she will feel good in France. Right now she is preety fascinated about the France, but she miss for her familly a litlle bit. She's writing massages to her parents every day and they believes in her so much. She have two weeks to started studies so she have a lot of free time and she enjoying her new city. Every day is quite similar, she's walking in the city and she started to began to be friends with her room mate. She is very carrefoul with boys because she doesnt want to fall in love. She have her studies right now and she had been hurt many times because of boys thats why she is reserved. Her best dream is have somebody to love whitch will be far from her right now. She dicided that when she will have a boyfriend she will meet with him maximum 4 time in the year. Unfortunately there is not any boy in the world whom will accept that. Paris is really beautilull and boys like her but she knows that she to fust and to much attached to peaple. Thats why she knows when she fall in love her studies will in trouble. She love hard and intensive so will be good to have distance to her new boyfriend and be far from him. Sometimes she's thinking that meybe she have problems with herself and she is mental, everything is because of she is so sensitive. In short she have too strong feelings to people whitch she likes.
DOPISAŁAM JESZCZE PARĘ ZDAŃ DO OPOWIADANIA:

Right now she wants to start be independent women who know what she want and is bad and ignore boys and be bad women. She is going to change herself from sensitive girl to strong women.
The party day in hell pub was really groundbreaking, She found the place for here there, she was feeling relaxed and fulfilled there. In the middle of the night she met there her friend from Poland and her name is Margaret. Margaret have a polish father, but she is french girl. That meeting was very anusual and unexpectible, like a unbelievable coincidence. They were talking few minutes and drinking vodka together but later Margaret had a black out and Paris need to accompany her and bring her back home.
do terri:uprzejmie dziękuję za rady, ale prosiłabym również o zmianę tonu, bo nie mam piętnastu lat i nie mam najmniejszego zamiaru kłócić się na angielskim forum. :)
Paris has dicided DECIDED to left LEAVE the Poland because of economic problems afflicting her country.

Przedimki nie sa stosowane przed nazwami miast. I live in Cracow, not *in the Cracow. Remember that.
i will remeber. Thank you :)
Right now (CURRENTLY) she wants to start (cos brak) be (brak czegos) independent 'women' popraw who 'know' (piszesz o niej, wiec?) what she 'want'. and is bad and ignore boys and be bad women. (zdanie do ponownego napisania, po polsku napisane). She is going to change herself from (brak czegos) sensitive girl INto (brak czegos) strong 'women'.

Cokolwiek skreslone, 'ukursywione' czy podkreslone jest do poprawy. Reszte poprawi ktos inny. pozdrawiam. Aaa, i:

Tips : 1. dla 3 osoby liczby pojedynczej w czasie p. simple koncowka s/es;
2. zero article dla nazwy miast (wyjatek the Hague)
3. przecwicz tabelke cz. nieregularnych leave-left-left
4. women - kobiety, a woman - kobieta
5. rzeczownik policzalny w j. angielski nienawidzi byc sam. Musi tam byc przedimek. Przedimki.
edytowany przez grudziu: 03 paź 2012
Dziękuję bardzo!!!!! biorę się do pracy :D dobranoc! :)
poprwione wystawię. wcześniej pisałam dalszą część opowiadania(dzisiaj po południu), zanim mi zwróciliście uwage na przecinki i stąd ich brak! tymczasem
nie przecinki tylko przedimki*
Cytat: lolenaj
nie przecinki tylko przedimki*


AL right. That's ok. Call it a day and rest some. Good night.
that' it :)
that's it :D
Cytat: lolenaj
do terri:uprzejmie dziękuję za rady, ale prosiłabym również o zmianę tonu, bo nie mam piętnastu lat i nie mam najmniejszego zamiaru kłócić się na angielskim forum. :)

Kochanie, dla Ciebie wszystko...ale dlaczego mam swoj ton dostosowywac do ludzi, ktorzy ewidentnie uzywaja translatorow do tlumaczenia, a nie swoja wiedze. Ty zaczniesz sama to robic - ja bede jak aniolek.
Co to znowu z tymi przedimkami jest? Jakas czarna magia? Dlaczego ich nie uzywasz? Myslisz, ze TY akurat mozesz ich omijac???
>>>>>terri, your written Polish often sounds a little bit hmnn...rude?
Your English sounds a bit... ..
.
>>>You're behaving a sort of battleaxe who will box any learner's ears for doing something wrong.
Yes, I am a battleaxe and so what? Judge Judy has nothing on me.
I do it because IT IS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD.

And another thing - moj najdrozszy grudziu - widze, ze musisz sam caly ten tekst nie tylko poprawic, ale i przepisac, bo asker niema pojecia jak formulowac zdania...
Cytat: terri
Your English sounds a bit... ..

I am a learner, that is not a feeble excuse:).
Cytat: terri
And another thing - moj najdrozszy grudziu - widze, ze musisz sam caly ten tekst nie tylko poprawic, ale i przepisac, bo asker niema pojecia jak formulowac zdania...

I doubt If I find the time to do that (most of the day at Univ.)

Słuchaj terri, zapisałam się na to forum z myślą, że się czegoś nauczę i już wyciągnęłam kilka przydatnych wniosków, które z pewnością przyniosą pozytywny rezultat a propos moich anglojęzyccznych wypowiedzi. niestety na forach znajduą się takie trolle jak Ty, które jak zwykle potrafią rozwiać moje nadzieje dotyczące ludzi dobrej woli, które potrafią najnormalniej komuś pomóc. jeżeli jesteś no lajfem, który chce się na kimś wyżyć, to nie rób tego pod moimi wpisami i nie kieruj swoich wypowiedzi do mnie, bo na mnie nie działają. dziękuję za pseudo - współpracę i nara!
>>>Słuchaj terri,....
niestety na forach znajduą się takie trolle jak Ty, które jak zwykle potrafią rozwiać moje nadzieje dotyczące ludzi dobrej woli, które potrafią najnormalniej komuś pomóc.
(oj, ta mlodziez, zeby tylko wiedziala o czym mowi....)

jeżeli jesteś 'no lajfem' (a to ma byc NIBY po Polsku, bo to nie jest mi znany jezyk) , który chce się na kimś wyżyć, to nie rób tego pod moimi wpisami i nie kieruj swoich wypowiedzi do mnie, bo na mnie nie działają. dziękuję za pseudo - współpracę i nara! (nie rozumiem slowa 'nara' - w jezyku'?

Moja droga,
Maucz sie uzywasz swojego rozumu i jak cos piszesz po ang. to nie mysl, ze nikt niw wykryje tego, ze uzywasz wszystkiego innego tylko nie swojego rozumu i wiedzy o ang.
Jak Judge Judy mowi: w twoim najlepszym dniu, nie jestes na tyle zdolna co ja w moim najgorszym.

Napisz ten tekst jeszcze raz ale POPRAWNIE. Dlaczego chcesz biegac maratomny jak chodzic jeszcze nie umiesz?
Widzę, że ktoś tu nie trybi. Napiszę więc po raz kolejny: nie wypowiadaj się pod moimi wpisami, albo: pisz i powodzenia w swoim bełkocie.
Droga 'lolenaj' , bełkot to jest to czym ty zaczęłaś ten wątek niestety. Poza tym, że ewidentnie porwałaś się z motyką na słońce, grzeszysz brakiem pokory a gdybyś była bardziej inteligentna, zajrzałabyś na profil osoby, którą próbujesz postponować zanim się całkowicie ośmieszysz.
edytowany przez argazedon: 04 paź 2012
Ooo, widzę, że zaczyna się zbiorowy gwałt na mojej osobie. Swietnie. Totalnym brakiem taktu jest ocena czyjejś inteligencji na podstawie jej starania się napisania opowiadania. Szkoda słów argadezon, naprawdę. Jeżeli zaś chodzi o terri to nie dyskwalifikuję jej wiedzy językowej, ale w stosunku do ludzi zachowuje się prostacko, więc ją kulturalnie poprosiłam, żeby do mnie nie kierowała wpisów, bo sobie nie życzę. Szkoda, że na forum, które nazywa się pomoc językowa mówicie komuś, że używa translatora google, co w ogóle nie ma racji bytu i wieloma przykrymi słowami zniechęcanie i demotywujecie kogoś do pracy. Śmiechu warte jest Wasze podejcie, a moje całkowite ośmieszenie nie ma tu racji bytu. Wiem, że mój angielski nie dorasta do waszych zdolności językowych. Dlatego też szukałam tutaj autorytetu, ale niestety wśród ciebie argadezon i terri go nie znalazłam.
Ja napisałem :
"...gdybyś była bardziej inteligentna, zajrzałabyś na profil osoby, którą próbujesz postponować..."
Ty odpowiadasz :
"...ocena czyjejś inteligencji na podstawie jej starania się napisania opowiadania..."
Może powinnaś zaczać od nauki czytania ze zrozumieniem?
Sens jest jeden, po psostu starasz się mnie zrównać z ziemią, ale niestety to ja jestem dla ciebie zbyt inteligentna. :) Czepiasz się człowieku!!! Najzwyklej się czepiasz.
Cóż, pozostaje mi tylko życzyć ci powodzenia w nauce. Nie tylko angielskiego.
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