Book Review - sprawdzenie

Temat przeniesiony do archwium.
Witam, prosiłbym o sprawdzenie poniższego book review mojego autorstwa. Z góry dziękuję za wytknięcie mi błędów oraz poświęcony czas, albowiem człowiek uczy się całe życie.

„Mistborn: The Final Empire” by Brandon Sanderson is a high fantasy novel. It is well-written story set in a mysterious land called The Final Empire which is very gloomy and dangerous. The time of action is not thoroughly fixed, we only know that all events happen during Lord Ruler’s reigns. The plot revolves around two primary protagonists: Vin, a half-skaa street urchin who possesses the power of a Mistborn and Kelsier, the Survivor of Hathsin, and one of the greatest mistborn allomancers of all time, the story is partly told from his point of view.

The novel begins on a small farm, with the liberation of enslaved skaa conducted by main protagonist, Kelsier, who posseses a powerful ability of burning ingested metals to gain special effects named allomancy. Afterwards, Vin is recruited by Kelsier's crew (Hammond, Breeze, Clubs, Dox and Spook) and with Kelsier’s help, Vin discoveres that she is capable of burning ingested metal too. From this point, Kelsier becomes her teacher of allomancy. She also becomes a part of Kelsier’s scheme which aims to overthrow the reings of Lord Ruler and set all the skaa free. A dramatic climax occurs when Kelsier dies while dueling with Lord Ruler and his crew, including Vin, is left on their own.
The book is beautifully written, with picturesque and detailed descriptions of The Final Empire. Dialogues are excellent and include many symbols, allusions and ironies which are connected with the situation currently being described in the book. The writer has created a curious, dramatic, gripping and suspense-filled plot. Even thought characters posses a mysterious ability of allomancy, they are very believeable, behave rationally and are always ready for the worst. The author also enables us to look into souls of particular protagonists and show us mental images of his unforgottable characters.

If you are looking for a gripping and excellently written fantasy novel, you cannot miss Sanderson’s „Mistborn:The Final Empire.” This particular book can teach the reader about some important values from which freedom is salient. What is more, it also show us that we are capable of achieving big things when we do cooperate with other people for mutual purposes. Moreover, it provides a welcome break from set literary texts and boring coursebooks. If you are looking for a masterpiece of fantasy, you simply are obligated to read Brandon Sanderson’s novel.
„Mistborn: The Final Empire” by Brandon Sanderson is a 'high fantasy' (tego nie rozumiem) novel. It is (brak przedimka) well-written story set in a mysterious land called The Final Empire which is very gloomy and dangerous.
The plot revolves around two primary protagonists: Vin, a half-skaa street urchin who possesses the power of a Mistborn and Kelsier(,) (tutaj nie rozumiem, czy ta druga postac to ..the Survivor, bo jak tak, to daj AND) the Survivor of Hathsin, and one of the greatest mistborn allomancers of all time, the story is partly told from his point of view. (zdanie nie jest za jasne, chcesz dac za duzo detali)

Afterwards, 'Vin' (nie wiem kto to jest, jego wczesniej nie wspominales) is recruited by Kelsier's crew (Hammond, Breeze, Clubs, Dox and Spook) and with Kelsier’s help, Vin discoveres that she is capable of burning ingested metal too.
A dramatic climax occurs when Kelsier dies while dueling with Lord Ruler and his crew, including Vin, 'is' ARE left on their own.
Even 'thought' (zle slowo, tutaj 'though') characters posses a mysterious ability of allomancy, they are very believeable, behave rationally and are always ready for the worst. The author also enables us to look into (brak przedimka) souls of particular protagonists and show us (przedimek) mental images of his unforgottable characters.

If you are looking for a gripping and excellently written fantasy novel, you 'cannot' (to jest zle slowo, tutaj daj 'should' -nie powinnienes) miss Sanderson’s „Mistborn:The Final Empire.” This particular book can 'teach' (ok, ale ja bym dala wiecej academickie slowo) the reader about some important values from which freedom is salient. What is more, it also showS us that we are capable of achieving 'big things' (nie, napisz to troche naukowo) when we 'do' (niepotr) cooperate with other people for mutual purposes. Moreover, it provides a welcome break from (przedimek) set literary texts and boring coursebooks. If you are looking for a masterpiece of fantasy, you simply 'are obligated' (nie, to nie tak - ujmij to inaczej...) to read Brandon Sanderson’s novel.

Nie znam tego, ale moze on pisal cos wczesniej, albo cos pozniej...mozna to jakos wkrecic tutaj. Mozna tez dodac 'evidence' dlaczego myslisz, ze to jest 'excellent writing' np - aluzje do czegos (daj przyklad), mowa (daj przyklad), bo inaczej to musze Ci wierzyc (ze to jest excellent) bo nie mam na to dowodow. :-) .
No i zrob coz z tymi przedimkami (a, an, the).
Dziękuję za poprawki, ale mam jedno pytanie. Napisałaś, że potrzebny jest przedimek przed wyrażeniem "souls" oraz "mental images". Oba rzeczowniki występują w liczbie mnogiej, a mnie w liceum uczą, że gdy występuje liczba mnoga to nie używamy przedimków. Jaka zasądę tutaj zastosowałaś? Pomogłoby mi to bardzo na przyszłość.
A/an sie nie uzywa przed l. mn
Wszystko jasne, dziękuję!