Kilka zdań o doświadczeniu zawodowym.

Cześć,
możecie spojrzeć i podpowiedzieć, czy będzie to gramatycznie poprawne?

My work experience is almost ten years in FMCG area. In my first job I was working in supermarket Biedronka for Jeronimo Martins Poland company. My first position there was cashier-seller, but after one and a half year I promoted to store manager. When I was 21 years old and I was the youngest employee in Polnad who has gained this position so fast. Last 4 years I was working in Eurocash Group, Partnerski Serwis Detaliczny company, where as a Regional Operations Manager I was looking after service for Customers in 4 provinces (21 Company’s) and operational management, marketing and trading area for 67 Customer spots. After work, as much it is possible, I am spending my time actively. On winter time I am picking snowboard, but in good weather I rather go roller skating.
My work experience is almost ten years in THE FMCG area. In my first job I 'was working' (worked) in 'supermarket Biedronka for Jeronimo Martins Poland company.' (arse over tit - poszukaj co to znaczy - tutaj trzeba ...in a JM Poland company - Biedronka supermarket). 'My first position there was' (nie, zrob 'I started as a') cashier-seller, but after 'one and a half year' (lepiej '18 months') I WAS promoted to store manager. 'When I was 21 years old' (nie, zrob tak 'At 21') I was the youngest employee in 'Polnad' (blad ortog - nie rob tego, bo to znaczy ze nie czytasz to co napiszesz) who 'has' Niepotr) gained 'this' (nie, 'such as') position so 'fast' (zle slowo, tutaj 'quickly'). FOR tast 4 years I 'was working' (worked) in Eurocash Group, Partnerski Serwis Detaliczny company, where as a Regional Operations Manager I 'was looking' (looked) after THE service for Customers in 4 provinces (21 'Company’s' (czy masz na mysli 'companies?) and THE operational management, marketing and trading area for 67 Customer 'spots' (nie rozumiem co to ma byc). 'After work, as much it is possible,' (nie, zrob to inaczej. Outside of work, if time allows) I 'am spending' (spend) my time actively. 'On' (jakie to slowo, tutaj IN) winter 'time' (niepotr) I 'am picking' (niepotr) snowboard, but in good weather I rather go roller skating.
My work experience is almost ten years in THE FMCG area. In my first job I worked in in a JM Poland company - Biedronka supermarket. I started as a cashier-seller, but after 18 monthsI was promoted to store manager. At 21 I was the youngest employee in Poland who gained such as position so quickly. For last 4 years I worked in Eurocash Group, Partnerski Serwis Detaliczny company, where as a Regional Operations Manager I looked after the service for Customers in 4 provinces (21 'Company’s' (czy masz na mysli 'companies?) and the operational management, marketing and trading area for 67 Customer 'spots' (nie rozumiem co to ma byc). Outside of work, if time allows I spend my time actively. In winter snowboard, but in good weather I rather go roller skating.
- fragment wg uwag

Za błąd ortograficzny - nie przepraszam, bo to żenujące, żeby w słowie Poland zrobić orta...

(21 'Company’s' (czy masz na mysli 'companies?) - 21 niezależnych spółek współpracujących z firmą
67 Customer 'spots' (nie rozumiem co to ma byc) - 67 placówek handlowych Klientów

"In my first job I 'was working' (worked) in 'supermarket Biedronka for Jeronimo Martins Poland company.' (arse over tit - poszukaj co to znaczy - tutaj trzeba ...in a JM Poland company - Biedronka supermarket)"
Ten fragment zapisuje dla siebie żebym zawsze o tym pamiętał :) dziękuję :D
Ja bym dał np shop assistant, ew. salesperson itp a nie seller.
Cytat: Aaric
Ja bym dał np shop assistant, ew. salesperson itp a nie seller.

shop assistant - zdecydowanie ładniej brzmi, dziękuję
My work experience is almost ten years in THE FMCG area. In my first job I worked in a JM Poland company - Biedronka supermarket. I started as a shop assistant, but after 18 months I was promoted to store manager. At 21 I was the youngest employee in Poland who gained such as position so quickly. For last 4 years I worked in Eurocash Group, Partnerski Serwis Detaliczny company, where as a Regional Operations Manager I looked after the service for Customers in 4 provinces (21 Customer companies /
21 companies of Clients / 21 Clients companies ??) and the operational management, marketing and trading area for 67 Partner stores. Outside of work, if time allows I spend my time actively. In winter snowboard, but in good weather I rather go roller skating.

Poprawiłem jeszcze kilka błędów - literówki itp, które zrobiłem dodając wcześniej tekst na telefonie.

(21 'Company’s' (czy masz na mysli 'companies?) - a może:
(21 Customer companies / 21 companies of Clients / 21 Clients companies ??)
67 Customer 'spots' (nie rozumiem co to ma byc) - a to:
67 Partner stores

Byłbym wdzięczny za wskazówki.
My work experience is almost ten years in 'THE' (to ma byc malymi literami, ja to napisalam duzymi zebys to zauwazyl) FMCG area. In my first job I worked in a 'JM' (ja to napisalam tak, ale myslalam ze sie domyslisz, ze to ma byc w calosci, bo niektorzy nie beda wiedzieli o co chodzi) Poland company - Biedronka supermarket. I started as a shop assistant, but after 18 months I was promoted to store manager. At 21 (daj tutaj przecinek) I was the youngest employee in Poland 'who gained' (zmien to na 'gaining) such as position so quickly. For (tutaj brakuje slowa 'the') last 4 years I worked in Eurocash Group, Partnerski Serwis Detaliczny company, where as a Regional Operations Manager I looked after the service for Customers in 4 provinces (21 Customer companies / 21 companies of Clients / 21 Clients companies ??) (tutaj ja bym dala 'customer subsidiary companies) and the operational management, marketing and trading area for 67 Partner stores. Outside of work, if time allows I spend my time actively. In winter (tutaj brakuje slowa 'I') snowboard, but in good weather I rather go roller skating.

Teraz bedzie dobrze.

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