Rozprawka - może ktoś sprawdzić?

Temat przeniesiony do archwium.
Witam i o życzliwość pytam! A konkretnie mam prośbę, czy ktoś może sprawdzić, najlepiej jeszcze dziś, tę rozprawkę? Zwróćcie uwagę także na styl czy jest wystarczająco "pół -formalny"? Z góry dziękuje za wszelką pomoc.

Since half of nineteenth century mobile phones have been available for everyone. Nowadays most of people use them and appreciate a big amount of advantages of this gadgets. But the rest of society doesn't need cell phones and thinks, that there are no positive aspects of having them. What are arguments for and against mobile phones?
The most important advantage of cell phones is opportunity in communication with other people in every part of the globe. For example, when I need to talk with my best friend or my mom to ask for advice, I can phone to them. Many people think that possession of mobile guarantee sense of security. If you have an accident, you will be able to take your mobile phone and make an emergency call. Finally, we live in busy world and we have to follow it. We can do this with our mobiles because they include calendar, calculator and camera.
On the other hand, using cell phones is quite expensive. Especially when we talk a lot, bills can scare us. Moreover, sometimes we forget about personal contact with others, because we prefer communication by mobile phone. Another disadvantage is connected with our health. A lot of teenagers are obsessive about sending text messages. It could be very dangerous for them.
In conclusion, modern gadgets have many positive aspects, but also we have to realize that using of mobile phones has negative effects. In my opinion, cell phones improve the quantity of our life, but only when it used sensibly.
Uzywaj tylko jedno forme: mobile phone albo cell phone

Mobile phones BECAME COMMONLY available IN THE MID-1980s. Nowadays, most people use them and appreciate THE advantages of this (l.mn) gadgets. But the rest of society doesn't need MOBILE phones and thinks, that there are no positive aspects of having them. What are THE arguments for and against mobile phones?
The most important advantage of [cell] phones is THE ABILITY TO COMMUNICATE with other people in every part of the globe. For example, when I need to talk with my best friend or my mom to ask for advice, I can phone them. Many people think that THE possession of A mobile PHONE guaranteeS A sense of security. If you have an accident, you will be able to take your mobile phone and make an emergency call. Finally, we live in busy world and [we have to follow it...popracuj tu dalej]. We can do this with our mobiles because they include calendarS, calculatorS and cameraS.
On the other hand, using [cell] phones is quite expensive. Especially when we talk a lot, bills can BE scarY . Moreover, sometimes we forget about personal contact with others, because we prefer communication by mobile phone. Another disadvantage is connected with our health. A lot of teenagers are obsessED WITH sending text messages. It could be very dangerous for them (dlaczego?).
In conclusion, modern gadgets have many positive aspects, but also we have to realize that using of mobile phones has negative effects. In my opinion, cell phones improve the quantity (zle slowo) of our life, but only when it IS used sensibly.
Dzięki wielkie za sprawdzenie. Chciałabym się zapytać dlaczego stosowanie tych dwóch form wymiennie jest błędne.
mobile phone (najczesciej 'mobile') jest uzywany w UK, cell phone (cell) jest uzywane w USA.
Prosze nie mnieszac, tak samo jak nie napiszesz raz colour a raz color.
Jeszcze raz dzięki - sprawa stała się jasna - po prostu w moim słowniku nie zrobili żadnej adnotacji i myślałam, że to nie problem.
Nie znalazłam opcji edycji postów, więc chcę się zapytać o poprawione zdanka

Finally, we live in busy world and we have to follow it in job, school and in daily routines.

In my opinion, mobile phones improve the quality of our life, but only when it is used sensibly.
Finally, we live in A busy world and we have to KEEP TRACK OF DEVELOPMENTS IN OUR job, school and daily routines.

In my opinion, mobile phones improve the quality of our life, but only when THEY ARE used sensibly.
Temat przeniesiony do archwium.

« 

Pomoc językowa - Sprawdzenie

 »

Pomoc językowa - Sprawdzenie