Czy mógby ktoś sprawdzic, to opowiadanie!

Mam wielką prośbę sparawdź to opowiadanie, to bardzo ważne dla mnie, z góry dziex;

James was with his class on a school trip in zoo. He saw many interesting animals, for example monkeys, elephants, giraffes, snakes. They were strolling on paths and admire animal. They had same free time, everyone went to the shop with souvenirs. James didn’t want to wait in round, and he decided to visit one more build which they missed. He had time to 2 o’clock. When he went in, to that build he found there empty cages, but when he wanted to go back, he heard noise. That sound was from gorilla cage. Gorilla was cold and wet. She had cuts shoulders and dirty fur. He was shocked. He looked at this animal and couldn’t believe, how people were able to do something like that. He was going nearer, very slowly. Gorilla touch his hand, and he fell like she would be please him to help. He had to go back, but he promised that he would come back. He went to the place when they were appointment. He go back home. He packed himself, and at midnight, came back to zoo. He went there where he found gorilla, he stolen keys, from watchman whose was sleeping. He opened the cage, and went with gorilla on river-bank, where was waiting for them a boat his grand father. He row the boat as much as he can, they swim to big forest which was situated ten kilometers away. When James saw first big trees, he sight with relief. On a bank, he say to the gorilla “ you are safe, it’s your new home, it’s ok, you are free”. And his adventure with gorilla ended.

może dodam...ekhgm... bardzo proszę!!

naprawdę potrzebuję tej pomocy, rozumiem, ze nie chce się wam tego sprawdzać. bo dlaczego niby miało by się wam chcieć? Proszę jednak chociaż o jakieś wskazówki itp.???

No, trochę poprzawiłem. Poprawki masz kursywą (mam nadzieję, że się przekopiuje z WORDA). Trochę byczków jeszcze może być ale na 95% jest już OK.

James was with his class on a school trip to the zoo. He saw many interesting animals, for example monkeys, elephants, giraffes and snakes. They were strolling along the paths and admiring animals. When they had their free time, everyone went to the shop with souvenirs. James didn't want to wait in queue, and he decided to visit one more ??? which they had missed. It was close to 2 o'clock. When he went in, to that build(????) he found there empty cages, but when he wanted to go back, he heard a noise. That sound was coming from gorilla’s cage. Gorilla was cold and wet. She had cuts(???) shoulders and dirty fur. He* was shocked. He looked at this animal and couldn't believe, how people are able to do something like that. He was going nearer, very slowly. Gorilla touched his hand, and he felt like she* would be asking him for help. He had to go back, but he promised that he would come back. He went to the place when they were appointed. He went back home. He packed himself, and at midnight, came back to the zoo. He went there where he met the gorilla, he stole keys, from watchman who was sleeping. He opened the cage, and took the gorilla to the river-bank, where his grand father’s boat was waiting for them. He rowed as much as he could, they floated to big forest that was situated ten kilometers away. When James saw big trees, he sighted with relief. On a bank, he said to the gorilla “ you are safe, it's your new home, it's ok, you are free". And his adventure with gorilla ended.


*O zwierzętach mówimy IT. Chba, że jakoś emocjonalnie do nich podchodzimy – wtedy HE albo SHE zależnie od płci.

No cóż, kursywa się nie wkleiła. No to musisz przejrzeć i porównać z tym powyżej. Parę wyrazów też wywaliłem. Pozdrawiam.

dziękuje serdecznie za pomoc, i będe wdzięczny, za wskazanie, kolejnych błędów!! Każde uwaga, jest dla mnie bardzo ważna!! :-)))

tego "cuts", musze użyć w tym opowiadaniu, ale kompletnie niewiem gdzie!! Bo cuts shoulders, tez mi sie nie podobało, ale nie miałem lepszego pomysłu..., co wy na to..??

Teraz na spokojnie jeszcze patrzę na to opowiadanie i myślę, że nie można row much. Najwyżej quickly.

He went WHERE he HAD met the gorilla

dziex, naprawdę mi pomogłeś!! Jestem tym bardziej wdzięczny, gdyż jest to bardzo ważne opowiadanie... :-)

Ja też musiałe napisać takie wypracowanie...W Enterprise 3 jest takie ćwiczenie gdzie właśnie trzeba napisać opowiadanie z wykorzystaniem odpowiednich wyrazów.THX