opowiadanie ( sprawdzenie)

Witam :) Bardzo proszę o sprawdzenie mojego opowiadania :) Nie zważając na fabułe lecz jedynie na gramatyke i słownictwo :)

It was dark , scary night and stars were twinkling in the sky.A group of friends decided set off to a cematery(cmentarz ?) , it was theirs favourite place and they spend there all free time.But this time they wanted to do something different , they wanted to meet a ghost.
Some time later they were siting in a circle , everyone was holding a candle and in the center of the circle was laying a book. Next everyone started called the ghost , but nothing happend , so they gave up.When they wanted go home they heared rustling leaves and next gigantic rumbling thunder. Everybody started run away but nobody could move. And then they saw the ghost . It was a women , very pale and dirty. Her eyes were red and heands were rotten. But what was the most amazing it was a fact that she all the time had foot under the ground.She was levitating!
She seemed to be very angry that somebody disturbed her tranquil.And five mintues later just disapeared and everything again seemed to be the same but it wasn't. Something happened with every person in the cematery , they couldn't say nothing. From this moment to the end of theirs life ,noone (nikt?) of they could say any word also noone of they could write.It was a secret forever. That night in the cematery were 6 friends , two of them commit a suicide and three of them ended in the psyhiatric hospital , the last person to this days is missing. For that people the worls never will be the same place . And that what happend never will be narrte( a to co sie zdarzyło nigdy nie zostanie opowiedziane)

To tyle :) Z góry dziękuje. Wiem , że tematyka nieciekawa , ale nie miałam wyboru :)

It was (brak przedimka) dark , scary night and (brak przedimka) stars were twinkling in the sky.A group of friends decided (brak slowa) set off to a 'cematery' (ortog) , it was 'theirs' (zle slowo-popraw) favourite place and they WOULD spend there all (brak slowa) free time.
Some time later they were siting in a circle , everyone was holding a candle and in the 'center' (centre-BrE) of the circle 'was laying' (nie, inaczej..there lay..) a book. Next everyone started (brak slowa) 'called' (zly czas) the ghost , but nothing 'happend' (ortog) , so they gave up.When they wanted (brak slowa) go home they 'heared' (ortog) rustling leaves and next (brak przedimka) gigantic rumbling thunder. Everybody started (brak slowa) run away but nobody could move.
It was a 'women' (z\le 'women' to l. mnoga-) , very pale and dirty. Her eyes were red and 'heands' (ortog) were rotten. But what was the most amazing (brak slowa) 'it'(niepotr) was 'a' (zly przedimek) fact that she 'all the time' (na koncu zdania) 'had HER foot under the ground' (przed all...).
She seemed to be very angry that somebody HAD disturbed her 'tranquil' (zla czesc mowy).And five mintues later SHE just disapeared and everything 'again' (w zlym miejscu) seemed to be the same AGAIN but it wasn't. Something happened with every person in the 'cematery' (ortog) , they couldn't say 'nothing' (zle slowo tutaj ANYTHING). From this moment to the end of 'theirs' (zle slowo) life ,'noone' (zle slowo, tutaj NOT ONE of 'they' (zle slowo) could say any word also 'no one' (to sa 2 slowa, ale tutaj zle, tutaj NOT ONE of 'they' (zle slowo) could write ANYTHING.
That night in the 'cematery' (ortog) THERE were 6 friends , two of them 'commit' (zly czas, tutaj przeszly) 'a' (niepotr) suicide and three of them ended UP in the 'psyhiatric' (ortog) hospital , the last person 'to this days' (na koncu zdania i DAY) is missing. For 'that' (zle slowo, tutaj THOSE) people the 'worls' (ortog) 'never will be' (zla kol slow..will never be). the same place AGAIN . And 'that' (niepotr) what HAD 'happend' (ortog) 'never will be' (popraw) 'narrte' (narrated, ale lepsze slowo to TOLD)

To tyle :) Z góry dziękuje. Wiem , że tematyka nieciekawa , ale nie miałam wyboru :)






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Just an observation:
If everybody started (brak slowa) run away then they must've moved.
moze lepiej:
Everybody wanted (brak slowa) run away ...

ok dzięki wielkie :) tylko jestem tu 1-wszy raz i nie bardzo wiem o co chodzi w tym (brak słowa) ?? mam tam cos dopisać bo mi sie wydaje ze niczego tam nie brakuje ...

oczywiście pewnie się mylę :)

tak, brak slowa znaczy, ze trzeba cos dopisac
np. everybody wanted to run away
all their free time
to sa slowa, ktorych niekoniecznie uzywa sie w takiej sytuacji po polsku, stad moze wrazenie, ze tam nic nie brakuje.