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Temat przeniesiony do archwium.
Siemka napisałem sobie taki tekścik i potrzebuję kogoś kto by mi go sprawdził :)

Somewhere in royal park
Baronage dancing festive waltz
In this place came witch
People ask who is she? She
dancing, dancing, dancing, with grace
I am afraid her cruel face, she
tell me, tell me follow me
I come but i don t know who is she

I asked her when we go
We're runnig for light and dark
She don't say anything
It seems that something is not real

For darkness woods(przez ciemne lasy)
for darkness tombs
She scream how owl
and want to steal my soul

She is bad I far away
You don't trust evil force
You must be good and honest man
Don't submit sweet seducement
Evil seemingly is very good
You don't know that is horrible
People want to physical goods
They don't know what evil bring

With is gray
She don't go good way
Witch come with very darkness hell gate

I trusted her it's my blame
My soul is white how moon light
People say, it's not real
Everywhere hear, scary scream
If you have, any problems
Don't forget what is wasting love
She hunt for me and lurk in tree
Darkness in her soul is big

In this waltz lurk evil force
raven sit on witches arm
he forecast death and hard pain
I wan't dance, it's not to me
If i will be good i will be free
she thing that I'm her slave
It's real word, It isn't game
I direct her, leave out this place

With is now under ground
Baronage once more dancing waltz
It was scary, It was real
This place is garden of fear
Niestety, nie ma tu ani jednego poprawnego zdania
jak to nie ? :/ kurcze to pomożcie mi to poprawić :) chociarz kawałek. Bo naprawde mi zależy i nie każde zdanie napewno jest źle. :) Z góry dzięki :)
edytowany przez piotrek13425: 27 lis 2013
ja widze jedno poprawne zdanie
Ok ale powiedźcie bo generalnie to w złych czasach pisałem bo to było takie na spontana ale to tylko tego typu błędy ?
Somewhere in (brak przedimka) royal park
'Baronage' (bardzo dziwne slowo, cos nie tak) dancing festive waltz
InTO this place came ( brak predimka) witch
People ask who is she? She (brak czasownika)
dancing, dancing, dancing, with grace
I am afraid (brak slowa) her cruel face, she
'tell' ('she' to 3os.l.poj, czas. musi miec 's') me, tell me 'follow' (3os.l.poj) me
I come but 'i' (duza litera) don't know who 'is she' (zla kol slow, ..she is)

I asked her 'when' (czy tu mialo byc 'where'?) we 'go' (zle slowo, tutaj ...are going)
We're 'runnig' (ortog) for light and dark
She 'don't' (to jest b. kolokw. napisz doesn't ) say anything
It seems that something is not real












For darkness woods(przez ciemne lasy)...(nie, tutaj Through the darkest woods)
'for darkness tombs' (tego nie rozumiem)
She screamS 'how' (like AN) owl
and wantS to steal my soul

She is bad (and) I (am) far away
'You don't' (napisz One shouldn't) trust evil force
'You' One) must be A good and honest man
AND don't submit TO sweet seducementS
Evil seemingly is very good
You don't know 'that' (what) is horrible
People want 'to' (niepotr) physical goods
They don't know what evil THEY bring

THE witCh is gray
She 'don't' (doesn't) go THE good way
The witch comeS with THE very darkESS 'hell gate' (gates of hell)

I trusted her it's my 'blame' (fault)
My soul is white 'how' (mylisz polskie 'jak' - po ang LIKE) THE moonlight
People say, it's not real
BUT everywhere I hear HER scary scream
If you have any problems
Don't forget what 'is' (niepotr) 'wasting' (inne slowo, moze diminishes, wastes) love
She huntS for me and lurkS in THE tree
Darkness in her soul is 'big' (moze 'enormous'),

In this waltz lurkS AN evil force
THE raven sitS on THE witche's arm
he forecastS death and 'hard' (moze 'unbearable') pain
I wan't TO dance, it's not 'to' FOR me
If 'i' (duza litera zawsze) will be good 'i' I will be SET free
she 'thing' (thinkS) that I'm her slave
It's THE real word, It isn't A game
I direct her TO leave out OF this place

THE witCh is now underground
'Baronage' (zmien) once more ARE dancing THE waltz
It was scary, It was real
This place is A garden of fear
Temat przeniesiony do archwium.