essay - ielts

Esej - IELTS - jeśli mogę prosić o przekształcenie zdań by były ich budowa odpowiadała formie wypowiedzi. Dziękuję :)


Some people think women should be allowed to join the army, the navy and the air force just like men.

Equality of men and women of rights infuelnce on jobs which sex is allowed to maitain and which is not. After some womens who had enough courage or interests in subjects connected only with men still and deweloped this subjects we should show this women publicly. Technological univerities are places where only few percentage are womens. Army is second place where men have right and can use power to show that women are too weak physically and mentally, but we are observing that there are more womens in the army in last few years. Being in the navy or air force is still allowed only for men, should that be changed.

First question is what makes navy or air force soldier efficient? Having ability to find yourself in very difficult situations, having good orientation. This abilities can be found in both sexes not only between men. Right searching should be done to find answers for question does women can clarify this same problems as men face while missions.

There can apear voices against, saying that womens body can't stand this pressure. Opening new ways can't be harrasing women to show that they can have as much strength and men when they in real can't. New ways should be open but forcing is not solution.

We should notice that army today helps rebuilt what war destroyed, infrasctructure and schooling army of origin country is not connected with fighting and showing musclues. When we look up carefully about modern army there is less about real fight than about thinking and abilities connected to both sexes.

In summary we shouldn't close womankind way to army, because army is not always blood and standing up to show fists. Women can't be also forced to cope with tasks that demand from them physicall abilities impossible to gain because of biological build. We can say that scoring for abilities that are necessary to cope with being in army are more important than first look does it is men or women.

Equality of men and women 'of rights' (tego tutaj nie rozumiem) (brak 2 slowa) 'infuelnce' (blad ortog - dlaczego to robisz? myslisz, ze to daje mi jakas przyjemnosc poprawiac tak b yle jak napisane slowa, czy cos?) on jobs (brak 2 slowa) which sex is allowed to 'maitain' (ortog) and which is not. After some 'womens' (zle slowo) who had enough courage or interests in subjects connected only with men 'still' (co to slowo tutaj robi? zaraz mi sie przypomniala 'still' w ktorej robi sie whisky) and 'deweloped' (ortog) 'this' (zle slowo) subjects we should show 'this' (zle slowo) women publicly. Technological 'univerities' (ortog) are places where only (przedimek) few percentage are 'womens' (co to za slowo? ani l. poj, ani l. mnoga?). (przedimek) army is (przedimek) second place where men have 'right' (jaki right?) and can use power to show that women are too weak physically and mentally, but we are observing that there are more 'womens' (nie rozumiem dlaczego uzywasz to slowo) in the army in (przedimek) last few years. Being in the navy or (przedimek) air force is still allowed only for men, 'should that be changed' (czy to ma byc pytanie?).

First question is what makes (przedimek) navy or (przedimek) air force soldier efficient? Having (przedimek) ability to find yourself in very difficult situations, having good orientation. 'This' (ale przeciez 'abilities' to jest l. mnoga, dlaczego uzywasz 'this' co jest l. poj?) abilities can be found in both sexes not only between men. 'Right' (napisz dokladnie co to jest) searching should be done to find (przedimek) answers for (przedimek) question 'does' (to jest l. poj ale 'women' to wiecej jak jedna, znaczy l. mnoga) women can clarify 'this' (popraw) same problems as men face while (brak slowa)missions.

There can apear voices against, saying that 'womens' (popraw) body can't stand this pressure. Opening new ways can't be 'harrasing' (ortog) (brak slowa) women to show that they can have as much strength 'and' (zle slowo) men when they in 'real' (zle slowo) can't. New ways should be open but forcing (kogo? czego? gdzie?) is not (przedimek) solution.

We should notice that (przedimek) army today helps rebuilt what war (brak slowa) destroyed, infrasctructure and schooling, army of (przedimek) origin country is not connected with fighting and showing 'musclues' (ortog). When we look up carefully about modern army there is less about (przedimek) real fight than about thinking and abilities connected to both sexes.

In summary we shouldn't close womankind way to (przedimek) army, because (przedimek) army is not always blood and standing up to show fists. Women can't be 'also' (wg mnie niepotr) forced to cope with tasks that demand from them 'physicall' (ortog) abilities impossible to gain because of (cos brak) biological build. We can say that scoring for abilities that are necessary to cope with being in (przedimek) army are more important than first look 'does it is men or women' (tego to nie rozumiem)

DLACZEGO nie uzywasz przedimkow? Czy to jakas czarna magia dla Ciebie? Prosze przepisac ten tekst jeszcze raz z naniesionymi poprawkami.

Equality of men and women 'of rights' (tego tutaj nie rozumiem) (brak 2 slowa) 'infuelnce' (blad ortog - dlaczego to robisz? myslisz, ze to daje mi jakas przyjemnosc poprawiac tak b yle jak napisane slowa, czy cos?) on jobs (brak 2 slowa) which sex is allowed to 'maitain' (ortog) and which is not. After some 'womens' (zle slowo) who had enough courage or interests in subjects connected only with men 'still' (co to slowo tutaj robi? zaraz mi sie przypomniala 'still' w ktorej robi sie whisky) and 'deweloped' (ortog) 'this' (zle slowo) subjects we should show 'this' (zle slowo) women publicly. Technological 'univerities' (ortog) are places where only (przedimek) few percentage are 'womens' (co to za slowo? ani l. poj, ani l. mnoga?). (przedimek) army is (przedimek) second place where men have 'right' (jaki right?) and can use power to show that women are too weak physically and mentally, but we are observing that there are more 'womens' (nie rozumiem dlaczego uzywasz to slowo) in the army in (przedimek) last few years. Being in the navy or (przedimek) air force is still allowed only for men, 'should that be changed' (czy to ma byc pytanie?).

First question is what makes (przedimek) navy or (przedimek) air force soldier efficient? Having (przedimek) ability to find yourself in very difficult situations, having good orientation. 'This' (ale przeciez 'abilities' to jest l. mnoga, dlaczego uzywasz 'this' co jest l. poj?) abilities can be found in both sexes not only between men. 'Right' (napisz dokladnie co to jest) searching should be done to find (przedimek) answers for (przedimek) question 'does' (to jest l. poj ale 'women' to wiecej jak jedna, znaczy l. mnoga) women can clarify 'this' (popraw) same problems as men face while (brak slowa)missions.

There can apear voices against, saying that 'womens' (popraw) body can't stand this pressure. Opening new ways can't be 'harrasing' (ortog) (brak slowa) women to show that they can have as much strength 'and' (zle slowo) men when they in 'real' (zle slowo) can't. New ways should be open but forcing (kogo? czego? gdzie?) is not (przedimek) solution.

We should notice that (przedimek) army today helps rebuilt what war (brak slowa) destroyed, infrasctructure and schooling, army of (przedimek) origin country is not connected with fighting and showing 'musclues' (ortog). When we look up carefully about modern army there is less about (przedimek) real fight than about thinking and abilities connected to both sexes.

In summary we shouldn't close womankind way to (przedimek) army, because (przedimek) army is not always blood and standing up to show fists. Women can't be 'also' (wg mnie niepotr) forced to cope with tasks that demand from them 'physicall' (ortog) abilities impossible to gain because of (cos brak) biological build. We can say that scoring for abilities that are necessary to cope with being in (przedimek) army are more important than first look 'does it is men or women' (tego to nie rozumiem)

DLACZEGO nie uzywasz przedimkow? Czy to jakas czarna magia dla Ciebie? Prosze przepisac ten tekst jeszcze raz z naniesionymi poprawkami.

Equality of men and women influence should eliminate which sex is allowed to maintain with some jobs and which is not. After some woman scientist who had enough courage or interests in subjects connected only with men like Marie Skłodowska-Curie and develop them. We should show that women publicly. Technological Universities are places where only a few percentage are women. The army is the second place where men can use power to show that women are too weak physically and mentally, but we are observing that there are more women in the army in the last few years. Being in the navy or the air force is still allowed only for men. Should that be changed?

First question is what makes a navy or a air force soldier efficient? Having the ability to find yourself in very difficult situations, having good orientation. That abilities can be found in both sexes not only between men. Searching should be done to find the answers for the question did women can clarify the same problems as men face while mission. ( misja wosjkowa - to poprostu misja- mission)

There can apear voices against, saying that woman body can't stand this pressure. Opening new ways can't be harassing (nie jestem pewna czy teraz jest poprawnie proszę o wytłumaczenie) women to show that they can have as much strength as men when they in real life (in actual fact) can't. New ways should be open but forcing (KOBIETY -PISZE O TYM W CAŁYM AKAPICIE) is not a solution.

We should notice that the army today helps rebuilt what war have destroyed, infrasctructure and schooling, army of the origin country is not connected with fighting and showing muscles. When we look up carefully about modern army there is less about the real fight than about thinking and abilities connected to both sexes.

In summary we shouldn't close womankind way to the army, because the army is not always blood and standing up to show fists. Women can't be forced to cope with tasks that demand from them physical abilities impossible to gain because of their biological build. We can say that scoring for abilities that are necessary to cope with being in the army are more important than first look is it men or women.

"terii" - PROSZĘ NIE POPRAWIAJ JEŚLI MASZ ZAMIAR PISAĆ TAKIE KOMENTARZE, WYJAŚNIANIE I POPRAWIANIE NIE POLEGA NA WYTYKANIU I PISANIU USZCZYPLIWYCH KOMENTARZY. NIE POPEŁNIAM BŁĘDÓW BO TO SPRAWIA MI TO PRZYJEMNOŚĆ!